Depressed, disjointed, struggling, irritable, irrationally angry.
How many of us identify with these words? How many people have come up to us and asked us why are we so irritated all the time? How many times have our parents told us "You used to be a happy child. What happened to you suddenly?"
There are many times we do not even know what these people are talking about. Most of us keep saying "I'm not irritated" or "I am not angry, I'm just emphasizing my point". And this, my friend, is a common problem all across.
Of course some of us are actually going through problems like a bad break up or a horrible boss at work or other emotional issues. If you know the issue, well and good. But for the rest, who are not going through anything substantial, there's a major problem.
The problem starts with social media. The first thing that most of us do every single day is wake up with our alarm clocks (after snoozing it for a couple of times) and then lie in bed and check out Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and Whatsapp. We read about someone else's bad experience, some horrible news, someone's reaction that doesn't match with our opinion and we go into instant rage. We start frantically commenting on the posts, getting into passionate arguments with a person we may not even know, trying to prove our point. We are unlearning to let go.
Remember the time when you used to have an argument with your friend while playing and you used to come home and tell your mom about how the kid was rude/mean to you? Think back to what your mom used to say "Beta, it's okay. He/she is your friend. It's okay to forgive." or "Aap toh achche bachche ho, aapko usko aisa nahi bolna chahiye tha." And the very next day you would be fine, back to playing with the kid on the field, without holding a grudge. These days, if you say something on social media, it will be held against you forever. It might be a stupid thing like criticizing the government or a film or a book or supporting a person that the general public is against. Although your opinion will not make a difference in any way, people start holding a grudge against you, sending hatred in everything you say or do. And like every single human on this planet, you want to be loved and accepted. You want people to have the same opinion as you do. It brings home a sense belonging. If there's someone whose opinion doesn't match your's you start name calling them. A typical example: everyone who agrees with Modi is labeled as a Bhakt or Moditard. Everyone who opposed his is called a Liberandu. Following someone with devotion is also looked down upon, liberal opinion is also looked down upon. We are extremely busy pulling others down instead of encouraging them to do better in their lives and work.
Then there are others who are busy posting holiday updates or updates about eating fancy food in fancy restaurants/hotels etc. and we seem to develop a sense of unaccomplishment. We end up thinking "Yaar, isko itni chutti kaha se milti hai?" or "how lucky is he/she!" or "itna paisa kaha se aata hai inke pass?" or "Main agar chutti ke liye apply karunga(gi) toh boss aisi shakal banayega(gi) ki maine usse uski kidney maang li ho!" We never start by feeling happy for others. We never stop to think about the amount of hard work the other person might have put in before (s)he went out on a vacation or to earn enough money to eat at fancy restaurants or stay in luxurious hotels.
With each one of us waking up to so much negativity, we are embracing irritation, dejection and a sense of hopelessness that it has started impacting our lives. We never start our day by counting our blessings. Instead we look at only our failures. We compare our lives with poster boys/girls of our industry or in our friend circle who are earning more than us, who we assume are living a better life than ours. I've started with a simple way to take my life, my emotions and my reactions back in my control. STOP. I simply stop and say to myself that I do not know the struggle/hard work or issues someone else is going through. (S)He is showing me only the wonderful side of his/her life and not the problems. I cannot allow my self esteem to take a hit because of this. The second and most important thing I am doing for the past one week is staying away from my phone for the first and last hour of the time I spend awake. I refuse to allow others' negativity to affect me any more. I have an opinion. If I choose to share it on social media and you agree with me, great. If you don't, that's absolutely fine. You want to name call me, get sarcastic, think you are better than me, by all means, go ahead. I am not going to allow you to have any control over my reactions and opinions. For the past one week, I'm less irritable, less angry and feel myself changing with these small changes in my life.
Let me know if these work for you!
How many of us identify with these words? How many people have come up to us and asked us why are we so irritated all the time? How many times have our parents told us "You used to be a happy child. What happened to you suddenly?"
There are many times we do not even know what these people are talking about. Most of us keep saying "I'm not irritated" or "I am not angry, I'm just emphasizing my point". And this, my friend, is a common problem all across.
Of course some of us are actually going through problems like a bad break up or a horrible boss at work or other emotional issues. If you know the issue, well and good. But for the rest, who are not going through anything substantial, there's a major problem.
The problem starts with social media. The first thing that most of us do every single day is wake up with our alarm clocks (after snoozing it for a couple of times) and then lie in bed and check out Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and Whatsapp. We read about someone else's bad experience, some horrible news, someone's reaction that doesn't match with our opinion and we go into instant rage. We start frantically commenting on the posts, getting into passionate arguments with a person we may not even know, trying to prove our point. We are unlearning to let go.
Remember the time when you used to have an argument with your friend while playing and you used to come home and tell your mom about how the kid was rude/mean to you? Think back to what your mom used to say "Beta, it's okay. He/she is your friend. It's okay to forgive." or "Aap toh achche bachche ho, aapko usko aisa nahi bolna chahiye tha." And the very next day you would be fine, back to playing with the kid on the field, without holding a grudge. These days, if you say something on social media, it will be held against you forever. It might be a stupid thing like criticizing the government or a film or a book or supporting a person that the general public is against. Although your opinion will not make a difference in any way, people start holding a grudge against you, sending hatred in everything you say or do. And like every single human on this planet, you want to be loved and accepted. You want people to have the same opinion as you do. It brings home a sense belonging. If there's someone whose opinion doesn't match your's you start name calling them. A typical example: everyone who agrees with Modi is labeled as a Bhakt or Moditard. Everyone who opposed his is called a Liberandu. Following someone with devotion is also looked down upon, liberal opinion is also looked down upon. We are extremely busy pulling others down instead of encouraging them to do better in their lives and work.
Then there are others who are busy posting holiday updates or updates about eating fancy food in fancy restaurants/hotels etc. and we seem to develop a sense of unaccomplishment. We end up thinking "Yaar, isko itni chutti kaha se milti hai?" or "how lucky is he/she!" or "itna paisa kaha se aata hai inke pass?" or "Main agar chutti ke liye apply karunga(gi) toh boss aisi shakal banayega(gi) ki maine usse uski kidney maang li ho!" We never start by feeling happy for others. We never stop to think about the amount of hard work the other person might have put in before (s)he went out on a vacation or to earn enough money to eat at fancy restaurants or stay in luxurious hotels.
With each one of us waking up to so much negativity, we are embracing irritation, dejection and a sense of hopelessness that it has started impacting our lives. We never start our day by counting our blessings. Instead we look at only our failures. We compare our lives with poster boys/girls of our industry or in our friend circle who are earning more than us, who we assume are living a better life than ours. I've started with a simple way to take my life, my emotions and my reactions back in my control. STOP. I simply stop and say to myself that I do not know the struggle/hard work or issues someone else is going through. (S)He is showing me only the wonderful side of his/her life and not the problems. I cannot allow my self esteem to take a hit because of this. The second and most important thing I am doing for the past one week is staying away from my phone for the first and last hour of the time I spend awake. I refuse to allow others' negativity to affect me any more. I have an opinion. If I choose to share it on social media and you agree with me, great. If you don't, that's absolutely fine. You want to name call me, get sarcastic, think you are better than me, by all means, go ahead. I am not going to allow you to have any control over my reactions and opinions. For the past one week, I'm less irritable, less angry and feel myself changing with these small changes in my life.
Let me know if these work for you!
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